would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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