She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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