why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
