roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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