if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
