and you said cock pushups were impossible
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
