ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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