Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Randomize
