I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
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