i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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