Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
