so that wasnt chicken after all
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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