wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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