just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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