Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I think i peed on brittanys purse
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
