i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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