Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
