Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(810): View more from Michigan

I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.

(1-810): View more from Michigan

Holy shittt I don't even have a bf

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(704): View more from North Carolina

I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?

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(614): View more from Ohio

just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious

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(203): View more from Connecticut

She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places

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(815): View more from Illinois

Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.

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(386): View more from Florida

I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?

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(504): View more from Louisiana

sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy

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(614): View more from Ohio

You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.

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