K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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