So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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