We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize