he wants to bone in the snuggie
no you cant smoke seaweed
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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