Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
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