i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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