I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
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