awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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