She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
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I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
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thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize