the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Is it penis luge time yet?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
