did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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