her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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