can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
