We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
