well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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