So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Randomize
