i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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