I think I just saw someone hide a body.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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