Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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