So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
