I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize