I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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