Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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