Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
