Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
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I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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