Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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