I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Randomize
