New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
