i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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