Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
