I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
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