What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
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I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
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And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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