I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize