Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Randomize
